Lost in the system

I’m a mother of 3 and a caretaker to my husband who has a type of terminal cancer. Life got real difficult right around 2013 when my husband was diagnosed with cancer. I had a job set up at a doctors office, instead of me being able to go to work to help out my family and possibly get us off of assistance I became a full time care giver for my husband. The hard facts are this…our government will give us help only if we decide to stay in absolute poverty. For the first year we lived off 680.00 a month, we had section 8 but it was still nearly impossible to make it on 680 a month for a family of four. Besides even with the assistance of food stamps and Medicaid insurance there was the fuel expense of the trips to Ann Arbor for treatments weekly and blood draws weekly (never at the same time of course). When my husband was in remission and as well as we could hope I wanted to return to work. What I found was no hope! if I were to return to even a part time job we would no longer qualify for the insurance that pays for my husbands life saving medications (38,000) a month in treatments, medications and Doctors visits. You see he doesn’t qualify for the good side of Medicare benefits because he is under age 50 which means every dollar of our income counts against us. Then my two oldest children graduated high school and began working part-time jobs, I took none of their money, it was theirs to build their lives. But the state (department of health and human services) said they either had to have their income included or move out. I had to ask my children to move out. Now my daughter is living in an apartment she can not afford and my son lives with our neighbor. Our family was placed apart, I can not help them like I should of been able too. I can’t soften the blow of poverty so they can go to college and try to gain movement from where their parents are in this world. No I had to place them in the same hopeless situation. I feel depressed most of the time, how do I find my way out of this? Lot’s of folks give advice and I follow up on every bit but most things are dead ends and I find that most folks don’t really understand the system or how people like us get lost in it.